A car alarm chirps in Southwood Avenue. On for two seconds, off for two seconds, on for two seconds, and so on. Intermittent electric birdsong. It’s the middle of the afternoon, the car owner presumably at work. It drives me mad. I leave the house and go shopping.

Two hours later, it’s still chirping away.

Quite why car alarms that don’t shut off automatically after a minute are allowed to exist, I wish I knew.

It chirps on. I feel under seige.