I can now confirm that Germaine Greer has joined that elite list of people who have wanted to see me naked.
I got a phone call from Ms McCarthy, who runs the life modelling class that I posed for recently, and who also auditions people who want to join the <a href="http://www.modelreg.com/">British Register of Artists' Models</a>.
It transpires that Ms Greer is shortly publishing a book about the history of male beauty and The Boy In Art, and is making a South Bank show programme to complement it. She needed a suitable model for an art class scene. I was flattered that Ms McCarthy thought I was the best model she knew of for the job, indeed I do like to strike <a href="http://www.modelreg.com/ds.jpg">poses akin to those in Renaissance art</a>, and so I sauntered along to the London TV Centre to meet the producer. He promptly asked me to take my clothes off so he could film me for Ms Greer's perusal. He'd been doing that with other applicants all day. Nice work if you can get it.
I heard back from them today. Sadly, it turned out she really wanted actual BOYS rather than boyish men. I kept thinking of that episode of Only Fools and Horses where Rodney is forced to pretend he's a rather over-developed 14, in order to get a free holiday abroad.
As retarded as I am, I'm hardly a boy. I just must be the most boyish-looking artists' model that Ms McCarthy knows of. Which is rather LESS flattering when you realise that most of the male specimens doing the rounds in London art schools must be over 45. I think for some of them, it's an alternative to getting arrested behind the back of Sainsburys. The real pretty boys are all in bands or magazines.
Shame. I was rather looking forward to exposing myself on ITV.
